EFW Wednesday Night Massacre
EFW Television Studios
Boston, MA
(The EFW Television opening is shown, follow by a shot of Jim Biggins and Buck Hammerstien in the studio at the EFW towers)
JB : "Welcome to EFW Massacre, fans! I'm Jim Biggins alongside Buck Hammerstien. Things are really heating up here in the EFW, but before we announce any matches, we've got an announcement from the President."
(EFW President Adam Walters is sitting behind his desk and addressing the EFW)
Walters : "I've got two big announcements to make today that concern all the EFW wrestlers and fans. First, the main events for our next two cards have been announced. Considering the participants in these two matches, I think most would agree that there is a very good chance that someone will be interfering in those matches. Well, I'm putting a stop to that right now. All wrestlers are BANNED FROM RINGSIDE during the main events of BOTH Mayhem and Massacre. Anyone who comes down to ringside will be slapped with a $500,000 fine and a 1-year suspension. Don't believe you're above it, either, this applies to EVERYONE."
Walters : "Second, the official date for our next PPV event has been set. EFW Armageddon III is set for Friday, June 30th, 2000! Armageddon is one of the EFW's annual traditions, in which every match on the card MUST have a special stipulation. This year's card will be headlined by current world champion Tyrant's first title defense. We've had some really wild and bloody contests in the past, and we expect this year's show to be no different. "
Walters : "That's all here from the President's office. Thanks for watching, and enjoy the show!"
JB : "There you have it, folks, straight from the President himself."
BH : "That should help to keep some law and order for those matches."
JB : "On top of that, we have a blockbuster lineup for you tonight. We have several matches pairing EFW newcomers against veterans of the company. Can they overcome the odds and win tonight?"
BH : "Here's the complete card!"
MAIN EVENT
United States Title Match
Nomad (c) vs Hannibal Lecter
The Warhounds vs Deathblow/Partner
Non-title
Death Match - 5-minute Timer
Bo Abobo vs Black Demon
The Mangler vs Jim "Quake" Powers
El Torro Rojo vs Weehawk
JB : "Newcomer El Torro Rojo has the same finishing move as Sickos on Parade member Weehawk. Weehawk attacked Torro last week because he used the move he claims is his. Torro responded by issuing a challenge for Weehawk to meet him this week on Massacre. Here it is, El Torro Rojo vs Weehawk."
El Torro Rojo vs Weehawk
This match started in the dressing room area!! Cameras first caught site of Torro as he came stumbling through the curtain, already bleeding from under his mask, followed by Weehawk who was carrying the broken handle of a ball bat in one hand and his bag in the other. Torro stumbled into the ring apron. He turned to face Weehawk, who grabbed his bag with both hands and SLAMMED it over Torro's head!! Weehawk then rolled Torro in the ring and the match was started. Weehawk pummled his opponent back into the corner with MACHINE GUN KNEELIFTS and stiff punches, then whipped him across and tried for a KITCHEN SINK KNEELIFT that was countered by Torro, who grabbed the knee, flipped over and rolled Weehawk up!! 1---2---KICKOUT!! Torro recovered his senses somewhat and when Weehawk stood he ARM DRAGGED the Sicko to the mat and locked on a CRUCIFIX KNEE BAR!! Weehawk quickly squirmed out, but Torro was relentless working the right leg. He repeatedly kicked Weehawk's right leg, keeping him on the mat, and went back to the crucifix knee hold. Weehawk got to the ropes and the hold was broken. Torro then pulled Weehawk up and hooked the arm for a suplex... but Weehawk flipped out, and when he landed he BLASTED Torro in the back of the head with a ROUNDHOUSE KICK!! Torro fell to one knee, but Weehawk wasted no time grabbing him, lifting him up and slamming him down in the LAST CUP O' SORROW!!! Torro was down in center ring and Weehawk locked on the cross arm camel clutch... Torro couldn't tap because Weehawk had his arms, but he couldn't break the hold and was forced to submit.
RESULT:
Weehawk d. Torro via submission at 6:17
JB : "The referee obviously let the rules be bent quite a bit in that one."
BH : "Well blame Weehawk for attacking the man in the dressing room, it's not the ref's fault."
JB : "Our next two matches are the results of the heated challenges thrown back and forth last week between Team Hellfire and the Sickos on Parade. The Mangler got involved and when the dust finally settled, we ended up with three matches: The Mangler vs Quake, Bo Abobo vs Black Demon in a deathmatch, and then all four men fighting again in a parking lot brawl on Mayhem with Bo Abobo/Mangler vs Black Demon/Quake."
The Mangler vs Quake
These two came right out and went straight at each others' throats!! Kicking and punching prevailed as the dominant forms of offense early on here as Mangler and Quake pummeled each other around the ring. Quake took advantage of a slight miscue from Mangler and DDT'D his opponent down! Mangler recovered and everything he tried got answered with a DDT!! Mangler throws a punch, Quake DDT's him! Mangler tries a drop kick, Quake DDT's him!! This continued until Mangler finally DDT'D Quake and the match turned into a battle of DDT'S!!! Both men were eventually stunned from the repeated DDT's. Mangler reached down into his boot and pulled out something in his hand... and then launched a FIREBALL at Quake!! Quake barely managed to duck the blast in time!! Quake then DDT'D Mangler down, pulled him up, set him and dropped him in an UPSIDE DOWN DVD!!!
Quake all but had the match won at this point... when Weehawk came running down to ringside. He jumped up on the apron right as Quake was finishing up his finisher, QUAKE DAMAGE, and the referee turned to deal with him instead of counting the pin. Quake eventually stood and grabbed the official, forcing him to pay attention to the match, and then SHOVED Weehawk off the apron and into the isle!! When Quake turned back, however, Mangler quickly rolled him up in a Flying Forward Rolling Prawn Hold!! The ref was right on top of the count and Quake was taken totally by suprise... 1---2---3!!! Mangler stole the win with an assist from Weehawk!!
RESULT:
Mangler d. Quake via pinfall at 14:25
Bo Abobo vs Black Demon
Death Match - Five Minute Timer
Bo charged across the cage and caught Demon partially by suprise! Bo tackled Demon to the ground and immediately began pounding him in the head with MOUNTED PUNCHES! He then stopped, grabbed a drill bit from his tool belt and began pounding THAT into Demon's head!! Blood was flowing from Demon's forehead very early on. Bo pulled Demon off the mat, ran and THREW him head-first into the cage!! Demon bounced back out and into the ring. Bo dropped and CHOKED Demon, then BASHED his head on the mat repeatedly!! The first four minutes were all Bo as he continued the beating by switching around behind Demon and BACK SUPLEXING him to the mat, then dropping and raking a METAL FILE across the wound on Demon's forehead!! Bo noticed the timer was ticking down to the five minute mark and a sick smile crossed his face. He pointed to one of the packs of explosives set up near the corners, then made a german suplex motion! The Sicko fans went nuts!! Bo pulled Demon to his feet and waiting for the timer to tick down. When the timer was at 4:56, Bo grabbed Demon in a rear waistlock, preparing to throw him into the explosion... but Demon must have sensed it coming! Demon quickly threw himself backwards, slamming Bo into the turnbuckle right as the explosion blew!!! When the smoke cleared, both men were down in center ring. Bo had taken the entire brunt of the blast right on his back, his back was scorched. Demon rolled Bo off of him, then draped an arm over his chest. The referee slowly counted 1.....2......KICKOUT!! Bo somehow kicked out, then pulled himself to his feet. Demon came to his feet and threw a clothesline, but Bo ducked it and grabbed him from behind!! Demon countered quickly as he MULE KICKED backwards and hit Bo right in the groin!! Demon then turned, scooped up the stunned Sicko and nailed a MICHINOKU DRIVER II!! The referee was right on top of it: 1-----2------3!! Black Demon wins!!
RESULT:
Demon d. Abobo via pinfall at 7:14
JB : "Mangler defeats Quake in an excellent match, but Demon pulls off the major upset by beating Bo Abobo in his element!"
BH : "Any Sicko loss is a good one, but especially to the rookie Demon."
JB : "Demon survived the worst Abobo threw at him and still managed to win. That leads us directly into our next match: The Warhounds facing Deathblow and whoever he chooses as his partner. Kyosuke Imori has stepped up and offered his services as Deathblow's partner, but no official word either way has come from the camp of the Inquisition. Let's take you now to Warhounds vs Deathblow/???."
The Warhounds vs Deathblow/???
(The Warhounds are in the ring when "Invocation of Naamah" plays and the lights dim. Suddenly, the Spanish Announcers' table explodes as Deathblow rises from the flames. As he gets into the ring, he raises his arms, and drops them. A small spark comes from a turnbuckle. Then, the entranceway is lit up by a huge pyro as Big Brandon McBastard comes down to the ring! Deathblow and BBMB share a mic)
Deathblow- Looks like we're together again, eh?
BBMB- Uh...we were only in something like 2 tag matches.
(BBMB then speaks in a different voice, a voice not his own)
BBMB (as Fallen) - He's talking to me, moron.
Deathblow- Heh heh, let's do a bit for the crowd.
(The lights go out. A stream of artificial lighting hits the ring.)
Deathblow- YOUR OBLIVION...SHALL BE REALITY...
Fallen- FEAR...IS IGNORANCE IN DISGUISE...
BBMB- I...AM GETTING SICK OF THIS GOTHIC S(bleep)T...
(The lights come back on abruptly.)
Fallen- Good job genius. There goes the effect.
Deathblow- Yes, you really must get back into this gothic monologue thing.
BBMB- But I never did the monologues!! It was Fallen!!!
Fallen- Then maybe you should just let me take over.
BBMB- You....I....You....goddamn...!
Fallen- Knew you'd see it my way.
BBMB- I'm really gonna get you back for this. It's Laibach music for a week...
Fallen- Why you cruel son of a-
Deathblow- Ok, I think that's enough.
(BBMB is beginning to hum "God is God")
Fallen- ARG!!
BBMB- I'll take over now, thanks.
Deathblow- Alright, alright! I think it's time we focused on our fight.
BBMB- Why? We know we're better.
Deathblow- Yes, but-
BBMB- Why even think there's a possibility of losing?
Deathblow- Well-
BBMB- I mean, you beat both of them yourself, right?
Deathblow- Well...that's not entirely true...
BBMB- What?!
(The Warhounds, sick of the performace, then attack their opponents from behind!)
As the bell rang brief brawl ensued, with Onslaught and Widowmaker dumping BBMB to the outside and landing a quick SPIKE POWERBOMB on Deathblow!! Onslaught dropped a HEADBUTT into Deathblow's back as BBMB got to the apron. Deathblow scrambled to stand as Onslaught bullied him into the corner. Onslaught pounded Deathblow down with several HAMMER BLOWS in the corner area, then reached over and CLOTHESLINED BBMB off the apron to the floor!! Onslaught turned back to Deathblow, but DB had recovered some of his wits in the short delay... he quickly kicked Onslaught in the stomach and lifted him in position for the OMEGA STRIKE!!! Onslaught fought the move, but Deathblow still managed to land his finisher, although it was not 100% effective, and both men were down afterwards. Deathblow groggily reached over and tagged BBMB, who pulled the dazed Onslaught to his feet and SHORT ARM CLOTHESLINED him back to the mat! BBMB then stomped Onslaught several times, slammed him down and tagged in Deathblow. Deathblow continued the beating.
Amazingly, Onslaught had virtually no offense at all! BBMB and Deathblow kept the big man on the mat and away from his corner as much as possible. Widowmaker managed to do some damage to his opponents illegally, using stiff PUNCHES and DDT'S, but was never tagged in. Onslaught was easily taking the worst beating of his EFW carear. BBMB showed his power when he applied a ONE-HANDED BACKBREAKER to Onslaught, following it up with a FULL NELSON SLAM!! BBMB and Deathblow then SPIKE POWERBOMBED Onslaught down, and then BBMB climbed the turnbuckles and landed a DELFIN ELBOWDROP!! Widowmaker ran into the ring and barely made the save as the referee counted two and a huge brawl erupted!! Widowmaker knocked Deathblow backwards into the corner while BBMB pulled Onslaught up.... slapped a hand to his throat and somehow CHOKE SLAMMED the 400 pound monster!! BBMB stood up to gloat .... but little did he know that he had awoke the sleeping giant!! Onslaught pulled himself to his feet behind BBMB, who turned to finish the match... and instead ran right into a pair of huge hands to the throat!!! Onslaught was enraged!! He choked BBMB down to one knee, then lifted him up from that position and delivered the DEVASTATOR so hard the BBMB actually flipped over onto his stomach!!! Widowmaker saw his partner's state and whipped Deathblow his way... Onslaught caught him by the throat and DEVASTATED him down.... but held on!! Dead lifting Deathblow from the mat all the way into the air Onslaught delivered a SECOND DEVASTATOR!!!! Onslaught then turned his rage to the referee, who was checking on Deathblow... Deathblow was knocked out cold!! The referee called for the bell and ran for his life!!
RESULT:
Warhounds d. Deathblow/BBMB via CRITICAL! at 13:50
(note: BBMB and Deathblow would have had this one if not for the crit)
JB : "You can never count out the explosive power of Onslaught."
BH : "Deathblow and Brandon clearly had him on the ropes for most of the match, but he somehow rebounded and delivered the Devastator for the win. But what the hell was that at the beginning? Is that McBastard guy a schitzo or something? Who the hell is 'Fallen'?"
JB : "I don't think anyone really knows, Buck."
BH : "Oh well, he should fit right in here in this god forsaken federation. We're the Arkham Asylum of wrestling."
JB : "That's the truth. Fans, it's time for the main event. Hannibal Lecter, ex-leader of the H-Pac, wants to win the world title but first he must defeat Nomad to claim the #1 contenders spot, and we all know that is no easy feat."
BH : "Nomad is truly an EFW legend and holds the admiration of more fans than anyone for longer than anyone else ever has in the entire history of the federation. He's won almost every title we've ever offered. He is more than capable of beating Hannibal Lecter tonight."
JB : "Let's not sell Hannibal short either. Having only two losses in his EFW carrear, Hannibal won the United States title at last year's Armageddon from the late Warpath and was never beaten for it."
BH : "I hate him."
JB : "Well, the words are said, let's get to the action. United States title on the line: Nomad defending against Hannibal Lecter."
MAIN EVENT
Nomad (c) vs Hannibal Lecter
UNITED STATES TITLE MATCH
LARRY WUNARMME: "Ladies and gentlemen, it's time for tonight's MAIN EVENT!"
('Follow the Wurms' is greeted with wave after wave of jeers from the audience. Hannibal Lecter makes his entrance wearing an iron gauntlet as the animated hammers march endlessly on the big screen)
LARRY WUNARMME: "Introducing first, the challenger... standing 7' and weighing 350 pounds... from Thailand, here is HANNIBAL LECTER!!!"
('Highway to the Danger Zone' strikes up and the roof blows off the arena!! Nomad strides to the ring, proudly wearing his US title belt)
LARRY WUNARMME: "... and now, the champion... from Boston, Mass... he stands 6'4 and weighs 245 pounds... he is the EFW UNITED STATES CHAMPION, NOMAD!!!!"
The bell rang to signal the beginning of the contest. Hannibal came straight in and tried for a body slam, but Nomad countered it with a knee to the gut and then a JUMPING KNEEDROP to the back of the skull! Hannibal came to his feet, but Nomad tripped him to the mat and applying a SPINNING LEG LOCK!! Hannibal came to his feet again, but Nomad was ready and ARM DRAGGED him down, then landing a JUMPING KNEEDROP right to his forehead!! Hannibal was clearly on the defensive. Nomad dropped him in a BODY SLAM, then pulled him to his feet and whipped him into the ropes. When Hannibal came back, Nomad jumped up and spiked him over in an ORIGINAL FRANKENSTIENER!! The fans were going nuts as Nomad climbed the turnbuckles. Pointing both fingers to the sky, Nomad leapt off and landed an ELBOW DROP that he held for the pin!!! 1----2---Hannibal kicked out at the last second!!!
Nomad clearly owned the match by the halfway point. Hannibal was floundering for offense and finding little, he landed a HAMMER BLOW that staggered Nomad, and then a second, but when he tried another Nomad grabbed his arm and twisted it, then jerked it down taking Hannibal to the mat!! Nomad held on to the arm and repeated the move!! Hannibal was on his knees, holding his shoulder, when Nomad lept up and ROCKER DROPPED him face-first into the mat!! Hannibal crawled towards the corner while Nomad gave the sign for the finish, the DANGER ZONE!! Hannibal grabbed his iron gauntlet from the corner and slipped it over his fist... but Nomad was watching him!! When Hannibal stood up with the glove, Nomad BLASTED him with a right hand that sent the glove rolling into the ring!! Nomad rocked Hannibal back into the ropes with punches, then whipped him across, but Hannibal stopped short, pulled him in and DDT'D him on the gauntlet!! Nomad rolled over quickly, holding his forehead!!
Hannibal saw his oppertunity and kicked the glove out of the ring. Nomad was now bleeding badly from his forehead, but Hannibal showed no mercy, pulling the stunned champion up and snapping him down with a SHOULDER NECKBREAKER! Hannibal then immediately dropped and locked in the IRON FIST, repeatedly bashing the champion!! Hannibal was eventually forced to release Nomad from his finisher. The pace now slowed and became very methodical: Hannibal would pull Nomad up and TOMBSTONE him down, then re-apply the IRON FIST. When he was forced to release, he would SHEER DROP DDT Nomad and re-apply the IRON FIST again. Nomad was given no chance to use his superiour speed or technique, he was being constantly pummeled by Hannibal's punches. The match which was once clearly owned by Nomad had taken a 180 degree turn and was now clearly in Hannibal's favor.
Blood now poured from the open wound on Nomad's head. The mat was stained red in many places and blood covered both men. Hannibal scooped the champion up and then K-DRILLERED him to the mat. Nomad lay motionless. Hannibal rolled him over and locked on a GUILLOTINE CHOKEHOLD!! Nomad struggled to escape, but Hannibal's weight held him down and he couldn't move. He tried to crawl to the ropes, but couldn't. The fans chanted his name, but Hannibal cinched the hold in hard and a spurt of blood ran down Nomad's face, adding to the pool forming under his head. The referee then called for the bell, fearing for Nomad's safety.
RESULT:
H. Lecter d. Nomad via submission at 10:51
NEW US CHAMPION!!
(Trash littered the ring as Hannibal snatched the US title belt from the referee. Doom ran to ringside and rolled in the ring , bringing Hannibal a mic. Hannibal handed the US title belt to Doom to carry)
Hannibal : ".... all in all.... it's just another brick in the wall."
(Hannibal then held up his arms in the X symbol, prompting the few fans his group had to cheer and return the gesture. Most simply walked out in disgust... but they missed the best part! Nomad had rolled out of the ring behind Hannibal and Doom and grabbed a chair... and he slid back in behind them! Nomad swung the chair and CLOBBERED Doom, but Hannibal dove between the ropes to avoid the next swing. Nomad threw the chair at Hannibal, his rage apparent through his crimson mask. Then, placing the US title belt over Doom's face, he hit both ropes and delivered THE NOMAD'S ELBOW on the belt, crushing Doom's head!! Nomad grabbed the US title, and as the fans cheered him on he threw it at Hannibal, who was backing up the isle)
JB : "Now that Hannibal Lecter is the US champ, he's going to get his world title shot at Armageddon 3!"
BH : "If he wins the world title, I'm quitting, I swear I am."
JB : "See you next week, fans!! GOODNIGHT!!"
Copyright EFW 2000.