McNichols Arena
Denver, Colorado
4/02/99
(McNichols arena is rocking as the fireworks explode, signifying the start of EFW FRIDAY NIGHT MASSACRE!!!)
JB : "Welcome to the mile high city, EFW fans!! We're on the air and it's time for FRIDAY NIGHT MASSACRE!! I'm Jim Biggins along with Buck Hammerstien and tonight we've got TWO title matches!!"
BH : "Not only that, but we will also see who is going to answer Antonio Mazarini's open challenge! Weehawk has said he would, but does Mazarini have other plans?"
JB : "We'll also be seeing the final Massacre appearance by a Sicko, as Vermin takes on Kurt 'Sky' Walker in his last match before the PPV."
BH : "I don't know what the EFW will be like without the Sickos, but whatever it is it's got to be better. Now if we could just get rid of that stupid H-Pac....."
JB : "Add in Executioner taking on Kyle Magnum and Rick Idol once again taking on the H-pac and we have one hell of a card!!!"
MAIN EVENT:
Marty the Mauler/Warpath (c) vs. Scorpion/Onslaught
Tag Team Title Match
Weehawk (c) vs. 'The Extreme' Condo Warrior
Hardcore Title Match
Sweet Daddy vs. Michael Luciano
Executioner vs. 'Mr. Massacre' Kyle Magnum
The Show vs. Mr. Wiggles
'The Icon' Rick Idol vs. H-Pac Destructo
'The Gentleman' Antonio Mazarini vs. ???
Open Challenge Issued
Vermin vs Kurt 'Sky' Walker
Walker made his entrance with some of his dojo men while Vermin was initially alone. Soon, though, 'The Extreme' Condo Warrior made his way to ringside, carrying a bag of Doritoes and a lawn chair. He sat in the chair and watched the match, cheering loudly and laughing whenever Vermin landed an offensive move. He would have nothing to cheer about in the opening minutes, though. Walker dodged in and out of Vermin's reach, laying in shots to the chest and torso. Vermin smiled as if the blows had no effect. Walker then showed his athletic ability by managing a SINGLE LEG TAKEDOWN on the big man which brought the crowd to it's feet! Walker then ran to the opposite corner and ran up the turnbuckle. Vermin was just getting to his feet when Walker came off the top with a MOONSAULT PRESS... but Vermin ran forward and CAUGHT Walker in mid-air, dropping him in a SEATED TOMBSTONE PILEDRIVER!! Condo almost choked on his chips laughing. Vermin didn't let up from there: he grabbed Walker from the mat in a ONE-HANDED PRESS SLAM, dropping him on his head. Vermin stood Walker up and hit the opposite ropes, prompting Condo to pull out a camera to capture the moment. Vermin came in with a monster LARIAT that spun the cruiserweight champion in a complete flip, Walker landed on his stomach. Vermin then gave the sign for the 187. Condo held the camera up, and Vermin 187 POWERBOMBED Walker to the mat... but not before pausing halfway through so Condo could get a picture. The pin was academic.
Vermin d. Walker at 4:21 via pinfall (187 Powerbomb)
(Editor's Note: Steve said this one was total domination by Vermin)
Mr. Wiggles vs The Show
Mr. Wiggles came down riding a unicycle and juggling some multicolored balls. Once he got in the ring, though, he turned into a monster, grabbing The Show in a FRONT FALLING SUPLEX!! Show wasn't phased by this though and came roaring back with some KICKS TO THE CHEST of the clown, then a BACK SPIN KICK that knocked Mr. Wiggles over the top to the floor! Wiggles grabbed Show's foot and dragged him to the outside as well, then whipped the much smaller man into the STEEL STEPS! Mr. Wiggles then produced a fork shaped like Winnie the Pooh and repeatedly STABBED Show in the forhead with it until the plastic fork broke under the strain. Mr. Wiggles held the broken handle up to a nearby camera, saying "Oh, bother." Laughing, he held up the H-pac sign only to be DROP KICKED from behind into the camera by Show!! Show rolled Wiggles back in the ring followed after grabbing a chair. When Mr. Wiggles stood, Show tossed him the chair and went for a VAN DAMINATOR, but missed as Wiggles ducked and BATTED him out of the air with the chair! Mr. Wiggles then tossed the chair to the mat and dropped The Show on it with a SEND IN THE CLOWNS which gave him the three count.
Wiggles d. Show at 5:02 via pinfall
'The Icon' Rick Idol vs H-Pac Destructo
H-Pac Destructo wouldn't make the same mistakes in this one that he did in their last meeting. Idol tried some of the same tricks, but Destructo was ready for them. Destructo kept Idol off balance with his power, landing a PRESS SLAM and following up with a BODY SPLASH that only got a two count. Destructo came in charging and Idol's experience took over as The Icon caught the incoming Destructo with a TWISTING POWERSLAM!! Idol stomped Destructo a few times, then executed a DIVING FIST DROP, but the cover yielded a two count only. Destructo leaped to his feet, only to run straight into a TIGER NECK CHANCRE, 'THE FASTEST DDT IN THE WORLD'!! Idol stood above his fallen opponent, only to have the referee admonish him for something for no reason. As Idol argued with the ref, Destructo stood and grabbed Idol in the HWO MAIDEN!! Idol stuck a thumb in Destructo's eye to escape, but the referee had already called for the bell!! Destructo rolled out of the ring and headed for the locker room, leaving an astonished Idol in the ring.
H-Pac Destructo d. Idol at 7:06 via submission
Rick Idol grabbed the referee by the shirt and forced him back into the corner. The referee begged off, but when he pulled his hands out of his pockets a handfull of hundred dollar bills flew out!! Idol gave the referee a LEGEND KILLER, then took off after H-Pac Destructo. Destructo made it to the back, but ran into ONSLAUGHT and the rest of the Pantheon!! The beating had already commenced when Idol arrived, and it ended with Destructo being planted through a nearby table with the DEVASTATOR!! The H-Pac soon arrived on the scene and the Pantheon quickly retreated.
Sweet Daddy vs. Michael Luciano
SD came out with a point to prove in this match. He dominated early on, beating Luciano down into the corner, and when Luciano tried to come out SD caught him in a BELLY TO BELLY SUPLEX over the top rope to the outside!! SD followed that with a SPRINGBOARD PLANCHA that crushed Luciano to the floor. SD hauled Luciano to his feet and slammed his head into the pole before rolling him back into the ring. SD then went on an unbelieveable flurry of offense, landing a SNAP SUPLEX, followed by an URANAGE SUPLEX, then a CAP SHOULDER SUPLEX that left Luciano limp on the mat. SD Gave the sign for the DADDY-PLEX...
But then, for no apparent reason, MARTY THE MAULER and WARPATH came out from the dressing room area. Both were dressed in black 3-piece suits similar to the Blood Brothers. SD saw them standing at the entrance and instead of going for the finish motioned for them to come to ringside. The short breather was enough for Luciano to attack SD from behind, and jumping up on his shoulders and landing his finisher, the BRAIN SCRAMBLER!! From that point on, Luciano dealt out his own string of offense: he applied a GROUND OCTAPUS HOLD, and when forced to release it landed a SKEWER DDT and a BACK SPIN KICK. He hauled SD to his feet and locked him into a BLIZZARD SUPLEX, SD's own finishing move, and got the three count!!
Luciano d. SD at 5:36 via pinfall (Blizzard Suplex)
(Editor's Note: This one dominated by SD, but Luciano came back and destroyed him)
Post-match, Marty and Warpath entered the ring. Luciano was wary, but Marty simply raised the victor's hand while Warpath gave him a round of applause. All three men left together.
Executioner vs 'Mr. Massacre' Kyle Magnum
Executioner came to the ring with his battle axe to the waiting Magnum. Executioner didn't wait for the bell to ring, though, he charged Magnum with the axe!! Magnum dodged the axe blow and the axe was jarred loose from Exec's grasp when it struck the turnbuckle. The referee rang the bell to begin the match, and Exec turned and loosed a FIREBALL into Mr. Massacre's face!! The ref immediately DQ'd Executioner, but Exec didn't seem to care. He picked the wounded Magnum up and nailed him with an ORANGE CRUSH that he calls the COUNTDOWN TO EXTINCTION, a blatent slap in Magnum's face. He followed that with his finisher, the LAST CHANCE STRANGLEHOLD. Eventually security came out to stop him, but Exec had a death grip on his hold. The police were eventually called and ended up spraying Executioner with mace to get him to release the hold. He was cuffed and dragged off afterwards.
Magnum d. Executioner at 0:03 via DQ
(Editor's Note: Actual match result - Magnum d. Exec at 4:03 via Doctor Bomb)
Antionio Mazarini vs ???
Mazarini hit the ring and strolled around for a little while, looking cocky. It seemed for a few minutes that no one would answer his challenge.... until an unmistakeable banjo tune came over the PA and the long absent Cletus came out to the cheers of the crowd. At first, Mazarini seemed suprised, but when Cletus hit the ring he became disgusted. He told the ref to make Cletus leave, that he wouldn't touch such a filthy slob.
That's when Cletus took the whole arena by suprise by CHARGING Mazarini and SPEARING him to the mat!! Cletus threw three or four punches at Maz before threw him off. Mazarini totally lost his cool and charged in, only to meet an ARM DRAG, and another after that!! Mazarini tried to escape, but Cletus kept pouring it on with a SHOULDER NECKBREAKER, followed by a FISHERMAN'S BUSTER!! The fans were going wild when Cletus wrapped on his finishing move, the spinning toe hold called THE HILBILLY TWIST!!! Giovanni frantically jumped up on the apron to distract the referee. Mazarini was writhing in pain, but the referee was distracted and didn't see it!!
Then, unexpectedly, MARTY THE MAULER and WARPATH again strolled out of the dressing room to the isle. They were once again wearing Blood Brother's style 3-piece suits, and Warpath carried a violin case. Cletus broke the Hillbilly Twist to take a breather and Giovanni immediately yanked Mazarini under the bottom rope. Mazarini began to recover his wits as he formulated a plan on the floor. Mazarini slid into the ring and Cletus tried to regain his advantage, but this time Mazarini was prepared. Mazarini threw every move he had at Cletus: clotheslines, shoulder neckbreakers, and an inverted atomic drop were all used. One JUMPING DDT later, Mazarini was standing over Cletus and laughing. Mazarini's offense culminated with a RUNNING POWERSLAM, followed by The Silencer to which Cletus submitted. Mazarini immediately called for a mic.
Maz : "One more pissant down. Take your country ass out of here."
Mazarini d. Cletus at 3:41 via Submission (Silencer)
(Editor's Note: Cletus had this one until the 3 minute mark. Mazarini would have lost if Cletus had gotten a submission on, but after 3:00 Mazarini destroyed him)
Marty and Warpath once again jumped into the ring to hold up Mazarini's hand. Giovanni joined them for the celebration. The fans booed loudly as the HWA and Blood Brothers appeard to be joined.... but then Marty looked at Warpath... and Warpath SMASHED the violin case over Mazarini's head!! Marty nailed Giovanni with a STANDING LARIAT from behind that knocked him out of the ring. Warpath opened the violin case over Mazarini, revealing it to be filled with BRICKS! Luciano ran to the ring to attempt the save, but was mauled by the tag team champions. Warpath stuck one of the loose bricks under his shinpad as Marty dragged Mazarini to his feet. Marty then irish whipped Mazarini into a LOADED BOOT LOBOTOMY KICK!!! The Blood Brothers were laid out in the ring as the champs headed for the dressing room.
Weehawk (c) vs 'The Extreme' Condo Warrior
Hardcore Title Match
Condo was already in the ring when Weehawk entered with his bag of weapons and his hardcore belt over his shoulder. He stormed to the ring, opened the bag and emptied it's contents into the ring. There were several bizzar edged and blunt weapons. Condo grabbed a large wooden board and waited for Weehawk to enter the ring. Weehawk grabbed a phillips head screwdriver and a chain and rolled inside to meet Condo's board assualt. He slammed the board over his back and it broke in two. Weehawk went to his knees as Condo rushed in for a knee to the face. Weehawk saw it coming and intercepted him with an elbow to the gut. Condo dropped the remaining peice of the board and doubled over. Weehawk got to his feet and stabbed Condo in on the top of the head with the screwdriver. Condo grabbed his head and rolled out of the ring. He rose to his feet outside and looked to see he was bleeding already. He looked torwards the ring just in time to catch a glimpse of Weehawk bounding over the top rope. He slammed into Condo knocking both of them hard to the ground. Weehawk rose first, Condo almost imediatly afterwards. Weehawk rolled in the ring and grabbed a barbed-wire baseball bat. Condo was in the ring and saw Weehawk advanceing on him. He quickly grabbed the first thing he saw : A bag of broken glass. He threw it into Weehawk's face. He dropped the bat and grabbed at his eyes. Condo took the advantage and hit Weehawk with a Skewer DDT on the remaining glass peicies. Condo stood up and grabbed a beer mug and pulled Weehawk up. He slammed the mug onto the top of Weehawks head, breaking it apart. Both we're bleeding profusely. Weehawk was staggering around, as Condo bent down to pick up the Barbed-Wire Bat. Weehawk was playing possum though, and grabbed the prone Condo and Set him up for a PILEDRIVER. Condo's head bent to left to much and he slammed into the mat wrong. Condo was visibly shaken and was having trouble getting up. Weehawk rolled out of the ring and flipped the ring apron up. He pulled out a small clear container, with holes poked into the top. Insider were 4 Red SCORPIONS! Weehawk rolled in the ring and Threw the lid off. He dumped the Scorpions out on Condo. Condo was coming too, but still hadn't realized his predicament. Weehawk reached down and grabbed a lighter and Waited for Condo to rise. Condo stired and felt something crawling on him. He looked down and saw the Scorpions and let out a scream of disbelief. He got up and brushed off the Scorpions. He turned around right into a Weehawk FIREBALL!!! Condo slammed to the mat, and Weehawk made the cover. 1-2-3!
Weehawk d. Condo at 3:59 via pinfall
Post match, Condo caught Weehawk on the way out of the ring and spun him around. Weehawk turned, a knife ready, but instead of attacking, Condo offered a HANDSHAKE to Weehawk! Weehawk was unsure of what to do at first... but then he shook Condo's hand!
MAIN EVENT
Marty the Mauler/Warpath vs Scorpion/Onslaught
Tag Team Title Match
Marty and Warpath were their usual confident selves in this match, while Scorpion and Onslaught were eager to get their shot at the gold. Marty and Scorpion started this one off with plenty of power moves. Marty started out landing a HIGH ANGLE BODY SLAM, then another! Scorpion rebounded by whipping Marty to the ropes and following up with a CLOTHESLINE!! Marty was up quickly, and landed an ARM DRAG TAKEDOWN and followed up by locking Scorp in a TEXAS CLOVERLEAF. Both partners came in, and WP intercepted Onslaught! The two began to punch back and forth, neither giving an inch! The referee tried to make all four men behave, but Marty (not caring if he got DQ'd) tossed the ref over the top rope to the floor. All four men were brawling in the ring!! Marty and Warpath seemed to be getting the worst of the beating. Onslaught had Warpath down in the corner with a knee on his throat, while Scorpion was choking Marty out with one of the tag ropes. Warpath began to fight out of the corner, but Onslaught grabbed him into a DEVASTATOR!!
But then all hell broke loose. Hannibal Lecter, Mr. Wiggles and The Darkhold came out of the fans and jumped in the ring! Goliath was tying up the referee while Mr. Wiggles and Hannibal jumped Onslaught from behind and the Darkhold grabbed Scorpion and executed a double-team SPIKE POWERBOMB!!. Shortly Mazarini, Luciano and Giovanni, the Blood Brothers, came to ringside armed with baseball bats! The three men pulled Marty out of the ring and began to beat him senseless with the bats. As soon as WP saw what was going down, he rolled out of the ring and gave Giovanni a STANDING SIDE KICK!! The three men were too much for him though and soon he was beaten down as well. The Pantheon came running out, minus the arrested Executioner, to save their friends and it was war in the ring!!! The referee simply threw the title match out and ran for his life. The remaining members of the H-Pac soon came running out to join the fray. Bodies were flying everywhere, TV cameras and monitors were destroyed, and a camerman was on the reciveing end of a LOBOTOMY KICK!! Then, a scream came from the entryway, signifying the entrance of 'MR MASSACRE' KYLE MAGNUM, pike in hand!! He roared and headed straight for the ring, almost impaling Rick Idol!!! The battle eventually spilled over into the fans, who ran for their very lives.
No Contest
(Editor's Note : Actual Result : Marty/Warpath d. Scorpion/Onslaught via pinfall at 9:53)
